Each week, our scouts gather together to share their observations on the most noteworthy Sunday performances. Unfortunately, after betting heavily on Misty May to win Dancing with the Stars, we had to send them all packing. In their place are Black Irish, Marble Ryan, Michael J. Cox, Mr. T, The Slow Eater, Steve Stevens, and Torry Hallelujah, who let us know what they took away from the Week 5 action.Mr. T: It looks like Cousin Bowser's Lehman Brother is coming outta bankruptcy. The irony: if Schaub starts, Marble Ryan gets points from him, but probably less from Peyton as a result of Rosenfels’ meltdown.
Marble Ryan: Obviously, today's events in the market are keeping me from saying everything I want to, but I will say this: if I lose on a Lance Moore touchdown, I don't want to be friends with any of you anymore.
Mr. T: It would probably look abnormal if you were pounding out on your Blackberry at your desk as the market drops to its lowest levels in 4 years.
Torry Hallelujah: Should be quite the showdown tonight between the Crew and Los Chefes. I think Brees is going to have a big day but that he’s going to be good for one pick 6.
Mr. T: Steve’s very quiet over there. I think he feels like he's got no chance in hell of winning. And if Lance Moore can get me the 9 points I need, there's no way Marble Ryan is ever spending a autumn Saturday night sleepover in Brooklyn again.
Mr. T: Do we think it's effectively time to close the book on LJ? A friend of mine at work remarked how he wasn't really paying attention to the game at the bar, but noticed once that they flashed the game leaders for rushing and he saw Jamaal Charles up there with 18 yards. After thinking about it for a second, it hit him that LJ must not have even gotten to past 18 yards. I'm definitely kicking myself over here for not trading Johnson in my $$$ league for either Fitzgerald or a T. Jones and A. Gonzalez package. The guy is terrible. Michael J. Cox might have to smoke and mirrors his way to more wins without his first and second round picks.
Steve Stevens: I'm quiet because I don't think I have any chance, and I'm still bitter about how bad the Lions are. Peterson's gonna run all over NO's swiss cheese D. The only hope I have is if he gets shot or the Saints can't run the ball on the Vikes and throw every down. This is why I play in 4 leagues...
Black Irish: 2Girls1Cup = 1Guy4Leagues. BTW, has anyone heard if Trent Edwards is still alive?
Mr. T: I like 2Girls1Cup = 3Lions2Many. It's a good thing you didn't put down that NFC North bet on the Lions. Is anyone as excited for the Drew Stanton betting era as I am?
Torry Hallelujah: Yeah, that call about the Lions was just as bad as Michael J. Cox’s call about his QB situation (which prominently involved Aaron Brooks) two years ago.
Steve Stevens: I need a league-imposed bailout for investing too heavily in the Detroit Lions. Is this an option?
Mr. T: This league isn't a communist endeavor. It's a dictatorship if anything.
Torry Hallelujah: Hank Paulson ain’t walking t’ru dat door.
Mr. T: I'm not sure what's more embarrassing, losing to a team that sported TWO 0s in their starting lineup (Edwards and LenDale) or losing to a team who started Orton and Edwards at QB and left an able bodied Carson Palmer on the bench.
Torry Hallelujah: Anyone else see that Jim Zorn let Clinton Portis call a crucial 4th down play yesterday at the end of the game? This league is going in a crazy direction.
Mr. T: Just think how different this league would be if Michael J. Cox had taken Portis, I had drafted Brady and Barber, and traded them in the pre-draft agreement to Cousin Bowser for Steven Jackson and T.O.
The Slow Eater: I think this might be the most games we've ever had being decided during Monday Night Football. It's good stuff. Going into the night game last night my thinking was that as long as Roethlisberger was held to 15 or fewer points, I was in pretty good shape. That didn't happen. Also, I'm having flashbacks to last season when I lost to Torry during Monday Night Football on an onside recovery followed by a 50-yard Nick Folk field goal as time expired. I'm not sure if The Chefs have ever recovered from the emotional scars of that night.
Mr. T: Matt Prater for President. From Rotoworld.com: Broncos K Matt Prater says he will try a 64-yard field goal before the season is up. The NFL record is 63 yards. Prater hits 70-yarders in practice and has thin Mile High air on his side, so breaking the record seems likely if the opportunity comes. Prater is already 4-of-4 from 50+ yards this season.
Michael J. Cox: Too bad Lane Kiffin isn't coaching the Broncos—Prater could try one from 75+.
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