Sin-Sin-Not-I

For week 3, I've drawn McCord Blows on the schedule, and I'm loving my chances. It's got nothing to do with the explosive start we've seen from that talented Mo-Fo Greg Jennings, by far my favorite player on my team. Nor do I think Peyton Manning is due for a big time turn around quite yet – I'm waiting for his bye week to pass before that pick pays dividends. No, what's got my fantasy juices bubbling this week is my Giants' D matching up against the putrid Bengals offense, who have brought shame on their fans and patrons the first two weeks of the year.

Heading into this season the Bengals were considered both a playoff contender and a team you could enjoy watching on a Sunday afternoon. The fact that the Bengals stopped being terrible at all circa 2005 is the ultimate expression of the NFL's much renowned parity, since the team was the lig's biggest joke throughout much of my lifetime. An afternoon spent watching Reds owner Marge Schott's dogs take dumps on the field was probably more enjoyable for a Cincinattan than going to a Bung-holes game.

After a brief respite from the misery for residents of the Queen City, it appears we're back to reality, and I love it. Carson Palmer has been atrocious, completing less than half his passes over his first two games. He's never been the same since the knee in jury in the '05 playoffs. During week 1 he could be seen making throws that had the fans clamoring for the days of Dave Klingler and Akili Smith. Most fantasy owners are already looking for his replacement in their starting lineup and you can't blame them. With names like Cutler, Rogers, and Rivers producing, you'd wouldn't be questioned for placing Palmer on the pine for the forseeable future.

Carson's gotten no help from his receivers Ocho Stinko and Housh. Missing the preseason is never a positive for an offense, regardless of how long skill position players have been together. You also can't expect the receivers to excel when the ball goes flying over their head. Slow Eater has Chad riding the bench for his team this week. Maybe you should too. Look for better matchups until Stinko proves otherwise.

The offensive line hasn't much better. The running game shines of mediocrity, with neither Chris Perry nor Kenny Watson able to do damage. Watson was a preseason favorite of the great Matthew Berry, but one can't be that high on him these days. I touted Perry as a preseason sleeper and he showed some skills last week against Tennessee. Given that the locker room is liable to combust at any second, even the poor man's Tiki Barber is a holding proposition.

Yes, I'm licking my chops for the matchup my Giants D drew this week. I'm ready to ride the failures of the Bengals at every level of the organization straight to a 3-0 start for Wo Ai Beijing. Sing along with me!