1. Held a webinar attended by Steelers linebacker James Harrison last week. It went pretty well, I’d say, minus all the shouting. I’m sorry for what I said about your wife, James — that was out of line.2. Not sure you fantasy footballers have caught onto this yet, but LaDainian Tomlinson hasn’t quite been himself this year. Trade him for the tandem of Clinton Portis and Chris Johnson if you still can.
3. Factoid of the Week That May Interest Only Me. Brett Favre’s inseam is 34 inches. What a gunslinger!
4. Caught an episode of the best show on TV last week: Ugly Betty. Move over, Sophia Loren — America Ferrara has arrived!
5. Coffeenerdness. For the past few days, I’ve given up coffee in favor of the packets of green tea that Phil Simms gave me after he came back from his off-season trip to Borneo. Then I passed out on the floor of the Seahawks locker room, only to be lifted to my feet by Floyd “Pork Chop” Womack. I owe you one, Pork Chop. Don’t worry, folks: I’ll be getting back in the espresso routine next week.
6. Enjoyable/Aggravating Travel Note of the Week. To save the company a few bucks, I offered to shack up in the Las Cruces, New Mexico bus station last week. Only problem, I couldn’t fall asleep because the bum sleeping on the bench next to me was snoring so loud. I managed to rouse him, but he just wet himself and went back to bed. Good news, though: after downing several bottles of Robitussin, I was able to catch 20 or 30 winks.
7. Not sure if you knew this, but Jerome Bettis is from Detroit.
8. Field Hockey Update of the Week. Mary Beth King took the field at Franklin Regional High School in Bethesda, Maryland last week, scoring 4 goals and adding 3 assists. Unfortunately, though, she graduated from high school 9 years ago and was detained by the school security team for disorderly conduct. You can’t blame a kid for wanting to compete, America.
9. Feel better, Maury. Your country needs you.
10. Who I Like Tonight, and I Mean Cris Collinsworth. Chargers 31, Raiders 17. Look for Philip Rivers to hit Lance Allworth in stride all night long.
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